Thursday, March 10, 2011

Either Him Or It

My suite has two new additions: a new coach and his alarm-clock (actually his cell-phone).

After only four days of sharing a small apartment with these new arrivals, as the other three of us stumbled out of our rooms on, let's estimate, the fifth snooze, I pantomimed this kabuki:

[rip his phone out of his hands]
[break the phone in half]
[throw the two pieces on the ground]
[jump up and down on those pieces like a four-year-old throwing a tantrum]

The alarm noise is a jaunty little tune that has become engraved on the inside of our skulls, right behind our eyes.  And we only ever hear the opening peals before he quickly turns it off.  Imagine hearing the opening chords of Wagner's The Ride of the Valkyries over...and over...and over...before your alarm has even gone off. 

I mean, I guess I could get up now.  Thank you for making sure I won't be late for swimming.  Which doesn't start for an hour.  And for which my own alarm won't go off for another 20 minutes.

Inveterate snoozers, please tell me:  Why don't people just set their alarm for the time they actually want to get up?  [I am not a snoozer.  Shocker, I know, after the above.]

Enough of this foreplay!  Either get on with the day or let yourself - and the rest of us - sleep!

Otherwise I fear that you too may approach The Last Snooze: one more reset and my suite-mates and I may be forced to invoke an either-him-or-it situation.

1 comment:

Lindsey Jerdonek said...

hahaha I don't get snoozing, either. I'd rather just sleep uninterrupted and wake up when necessary!

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